SexyShivonne

I dont know what’s going on with me. It seems as though I have disconnected with my weight loss. I know its still on the other end saying… “hello”….”hello”…”Is anyone there?”, and I on the other end, have put the phone down somewhere, and just walked the hell away from it.

In the back of my mind I picture myself as this sexy carmel woman built like a brick house. You know… the kind of woman who is not skinny, but has curves for days in all the right places with the slim waist (no rolls). 

I dont ever want to be skinny because I know that I will never be that person. It’s not in my family structure to be bone skinnny, which is not a problem with me. 

I see myself now as a brick house with extra siding and a big wide porch! LOL!

It is a daily battle for me. I think about food more than I think about anything else, which to me is not good. I was raised in an African American family who’s culture originated in the carribean, so I have been brought up eating all these wonderful, soulful, hearty, comfort foods, that are not good health wise and so have been taught to cook that way. You know… fried everything, chicken, porkchops, fried fish, fried plantains… then there’s the never ending white rice we consume daily. All the pork dishes, and desserts! UGH! That’s not even all of it! Turkey day and Christmas is like a heart attack waiting to happen around that time at my families house.  

So I guess since conception I had no choice but to fall in love with food.  It just TASTE SOOOO GOOD!!!!!  LOL! I have however learned to cook more healthier food, but I dont do that everynight.

I know I will get to my inner brick house one day.  I just know it.

I havent hung up entirely, but weight loss is sure on hold right now. 

I really dont have much to say in this blog, except that I fell off in the start of the week, and I still have not got back up yet.

This whole week has been a hectic busy one for me. I havent gotten one lick of excersise in. My eating has not been so great, and my energy is drained…

UGH!!!

Now the dreadful weekend is here!

Yesterday I blogged how I wasnt sore after working out to my ”The Firm” fitness video. Well guess what? TodayI’m feeling it! Everywhere! LOL!  From my arms, to my stomach (which I’m happy about), to my legs!  I guess this means I’m doing something right. 

I didnt get to work out yesterday, because I had a late night after coming home from my daughters choir performance.  I didnt plan to workout because I knew I would be so tired by the end of my night. I did get in a 20 minute walk at lunch though.  So at least it was something.

I did awsome on my eating not going over my daily calorie allowance. and I got down about 36 oz of water.  I’m still working on getting up to 48 oz by this weekend. It’s so hard for me to dring water when I get home from work. That’s where I dead end at. 

I think my body is rewarding me for all my hard work, because I lost another 2 pounds. One more until I reach my mini goal, which I think I will be able to get to by Friday! So I’m excited about that and I know that’s definitely a reachable goal.

Welp, my fellow buddies…I gotta get back to work!!!!  :0)

So yesterday I did it!  I did my “The Firm Complete Aerobics and Weight Training” 58-minute workout.

I made a plan to workout at the end of my day no matter what, and I did it before I was too tired and was 3 inches from the bed. I popped in the video and just started moving. Before I knew it I was coming to the cool off at the end of the video.

I have to confess, it was really HARD for me to  get through the whole thing, but on the parts I just could’nt do, I walked around the room while taking a water break, then I got right back to it.  I’m so proud of myself just for getting started. I can say it was more excersise than I did the day before which I feel is on the way to a healthier me!  

I even wore my sauna suit.   Man I tell you.  Those things make you sweat like the devil is sitting right in your living room staring at you! LOL!  It made me sweat all over…even my arms were sweating! I’m definitly gonna try to wear that on every workout. I know it’s just water weight that I’m sweating out, but every bit helps!

After my workout, I took my shower and hopped in the bed. I slept hard as a rock! It seemed like I didnt even sleep five minutes before my alarm clock went off. 

I’m not sore, surprisingly.  ;0).      My plan for today is to do the same. I set a goal to workout to my video’s until I can work through the whole thing. Then I’ll switch it up and add the next level in.

I’m excited and nervous at the same time about working out. I’m nervous because I dont want to burn myself out and stop like i’ve done so many times before.

Hopefully that wont be the case, cause eventually I want to join the forums, and get involved on the wildcat’s team. Those chicka’s are awsome.  I peeked in and was really motivated, but I feel I’m just not up to par with all those fit kitty’s in there.

I’m working on it tho!   :0)      He he…

*This is an old rant I have had for years.*

I was told by someone I was interested in dating that they prefer “thick gurls”

Oh, no…We’re just friends.  I like my girls to have some meat on their bones, was the response I got. *uh-huh!* (o.o) 

Only to find a email with pictures of the skinny biotch all in it!

HMMM… doesnt add up right?  Not the way I do math.    

Skinny biotch + pictures =  Something’s not right

Oh, did I mention I really dont care for this skinny biotch.  I’ve met her before. Something about her doesnt fit well with me. I’ve told the other party involved about how I feel about the SB, and was assured that it’s nothing but friendship between them.  “Oh, she’s not my type. You know I like them thick gurls!”

“*Ssssuuuureeeee!* “  was the only come back I could think of at the time.

UGH, damn those skinny girls.   

Has any of by fellow bs’ers gone through this before?  GEEZ!

Here it is Monday, and I am up 3 pounds that I lost. I REALLY, really tried to stay on track and eat right.  I actually didnt eat that bad, I just didnt eat that good. LOL! Both Saturday and Sunday I had 2 slices of pizza for lunch. Saturday nite, I went out and went to Denny’s with friends. That didnt go over so well cause I totally blew it, ordering a YUMMY cheeseburger with fries and a strawberry shake! *YIKES*

Then Sunday nite, my roomate brings home Burger King, cause she got some for free from her job. (in my most sarcastic voice) *THAAAAANKS!*  Welp, that was a wrap, cause I know that sent me over the top…hince the 3 pounds gained that I had lost in just three days last week. UGH!  I even tried to peptalk myslef by thinking my new motto: 

*why waste those calories that you worked so hard to burn off*  

 …EH! 

OH-EM-GEE!!!

This is my third day of my “life change” as I like to call it, and I’m down 3 pnds. I’m happy for myself, but I dont want to get excited because it’s friday and I have the weekend to get through, which is my toughest.

Weekends is usaually the time where I tend to let go and relax and just be. That goes the same for my diet.  Through out the week I’m here at my desk for 9 hours, so I tend to be more anal about what I’m eating and drinking, and I seem to control all of that while tip-tapping away.  I also have been forcing myself to dring water too. Yesterday I got down about 36 ounces! *WHEW* It was a conscious effort I had to make each time, but I got it down.  For some reason I forget to drink water, and I KNOW that is a big key to helping weight loss.

Because of my anxiety of over doing it this weekend, I did come up with a plan.

1. WATER, WATER, WATER 2. Try to eat small meals with snacks in between 3. Portion control and healthy eating choices; now this is a hard one for me, as I dont have much money to spend, but I’m gonna make it work  4. Get out and do some form of excersise! 5. Dont give up, stay motivated! I’m also gonna be on BS alot. I’m even thinking of logging on everytime I feel the urge to get off track.

 I also have this sentence that I keep saying over and over to myself, which is:  

Why waste those hard earned lost calories on 5 seconds of bliss! Happy Friday everyone!

Food Log

Exercise Log

Hi guys!

I’m back! 

Hopefully back and better than ever. This is my first time on here since July of 08.  Wowee… 

Well, what happened you ask? I was starting to get lazy and off track with my dieting and excersise, then…it happened. My computer crashed! *eek*

So you know, that was the end of all ends for me.  No online support or blogs or just daily positive comments from my buddies here on BM. *(shout out to Nancy, she’s awsome!)* 

I did try and diet off and on since then, but nothing stuck. 10 pounds later, I decided to get REALLY serious. Like obsessive serious. I think that is the only way I can stay motivated and focused on getting  slimmer. 

Once again it’s on!!!

Food Log

Exercise Log

I had so much FUN. I got to act like a little kid for a couple of hours which is nice. I have a little kid spirit about myself anyways, and I like to play video games so this was right up my alley.

Our function was provided with food from the D&B menu which was cool, but now the worry comes in. DAMN!!! Because I love food I’m, let me just explain what they offered us to eat… There were make your own “white castle” style cheeseburgers and all the trimmings…make your own tacos and burritos with all the trimmings, including guac and sour cream, salsa…Chicken or beef filling or chicken fajita or beef fajita style filling…Mexican rice…Black beans…Salad (which of course I tried to eat alot of)…UGH, DO I HAVE TO GO ON???? I think we can all get the picture! So I had a REALLY hard time with that. Food is my weakness. It just taste SOOO DAMN GOOD! 

…So now here I am. Not sure if I gained or lost any cause I still have not gotten a scale to weigh myself. It’s Tuesday and the 4th is coming right around the corner.

I think I’m going to try and find someone who I can pay to keep me from eating the wrong things, cause I just know all kinds of goodies will be offered to me within these next couple of days into next week. GGREEAAATTTT!!!! (that was me being sarcastic)…

Today I have a department outing at Dave & Busters with my job. How fun, right?

Well, yes and no.

If some of you buddies live in a part of the US that doesn’t have a D&B, it’s a like grown up video arcade. It’s really fun. They also serve food as well.  I do believe my department will have a buffet style lunch to serve for all of us to enjoy while we are there. That’s were I’m nervous.

I’ve been doing so good this week exercising and watching what I eat. I still haven’t bought a scale yet, so I don’t know my exact weight but I think I have not gained anything (well hopefully).

So I have thought of a plan that will hopefully get me thought today’s lunch menu. I’ve planned to try and find the most healthiest food offered and go with that. I’m sure a salad will be offered as a choice and that is what I will choose. I know for a fact that one of the menu items are theses small bite size cheeseburgers similar to white castles that you can “build your own”.  I must say that I probably wont pass that up. I’m not stressing tho, cause I plan to modify it by adding veggies and taking off the top bun and just sticking to eating one! (that’s the plan!)…

So wish me well, but I think I got this. LOL! I do like to play video games, so I will also try to occupy my time by playing the games and maybe I can get a little workout to boot!  =O)

I’ll blog about my day tonight when I get home. I’ll try to include a pic or two as well!

!!!!!!!!!Happy Friday!!!!!!!!!